Alison Jerabek.Com

Once, long, long ago, there was a silly little soldier who liked to argue about politics, her hair, and whatever else lit the fire under her own personal hot air balloon. She annoyed the piss out of her co-workers, her family, her friends, and even the occasional boyfriend (when she wasn't busy finding a new one). One day, she was bumming around on Google, and stumbled across this novel idea known as the Blog.

Read the full story of how I made my internet fortune-->>

Never one to pass up a opportunity to start a [verbal] fight, she quickly signed up for a Blogspot account and crafted MySpace worthy debacle blog complete with a cheesy name and URL. [She was such a noob that she didn't know that Wordpress even existed.] Words like 'social networking,' 'SEO,' or 'RSS,' now liberally sprinkled throughout her daily vocabulary, were unknown to her virgin tongue. Hell, she didn't even have a Facebook account.

She wrote her heart out for several months and never received the teeniest bit of attention. Defeated and bored, she deleted most of her posts, set the blog's permissions to author-only, and went on an indefinite hiatus to South Korea a lovely tropical island with blinding white sands and endless umbrella-ed drinks.

Well, maybe not so indefinite.

The blogging world sucked her back in when she was pregnant with her son and she launched a mommy-driven blog that was centered around fashion and beauty topics. After struggling to find a good name (and floundering around without a whole lot of focus), the blog was christened Make Me a Hot Mama. It wasn't any more successful than "Love2Fight" was, but she kept on posting. Due to the fact that she didn't have a dime to her name was permanently temporarily unemployed, she then attempted to niche blog (albeit in a poorly researched and engineered niche) with Blab 'n Bytes (now Blab 'n Flab) Freak News Daily .

She made a dime. And then two. To be precise, she's joined the ranks of the many successful internet millionaires with a whopping yearly income of 240 dimes, and if Google ever gives her that money, she plans to gleefully flip FDR's shiny little head into a scummy mall fountain two hundred and forty effin times. She is a very charitable person. Thankfully, she will not waste anymore of her already wasted life throwing money in mall fountains because, as we all know, she will never pry her well-earned coin from Google's dastardly clutches.

Twitter swooped in to protect her chutzpah from, and I quote, perduring damage. Google it. Still, it was inevitable that her blogging would slowly decline from its pinnacle of bloggy correctness as she quit reading Problogger daily. She decided to screw SEO and search engines as hard as they had screwed her, and made the dubious decision to quit writing content and start writing stories. Or something like that. Most of the time.

Which brings us back to AlisonJerabek.Com, the newest old blog on the block. What's a girl to do? Blogging and Alison go to together like Rihanna and Chris Brown, in a totally healthy, mature sort of way, of course. Those posts that say they were published in 2006? Bona fide, my lovelies. Yeah, a nearly 2-year hiatus in posting is fishy, but that's how she rolls. Suck it, Google. The legend of the internet's most discombobulated and inconsistent blogger shall live on.

And all the people said,"Amen."

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When she's not busy talking about herself in the third person, Alison (AJae) twitters, mismanages Make Me a Hot Mama Magazine and Blab 'n Flab Freak News Daily, and plays mommy to an adorable little boy. In that order.